Sex Column: La Crme de l’orgasme

Like music and movies, there are many different sex toys out there. From sleeves to vibrators to cock rings, there is a plethora of pleasurable choices to rock your world. However, also like music and movies, some just suck—and not in the good way; others may just rub you the wrong way. In order to help narrow down your search for your new best friend, here are la crème de la crème, or rather, la crème de l’orgasme, of sex toys.

For those of you with internal plumbing, listen up, because this is for you. If you want something to delve into your inner workings while still stimulating your clitoris, here are two orgasmic options. The Rabbit, the eighth-most-sold sex toy on, is a fleshy vibrator which also has a separate prong that appears to be two little bunny ears. These “ears” flicker back and forth, ringing your bell while the larger prong delves into you. It is also reasonably cheap, coming in around $18 on Amazon. 

The second option is the Butterfly Kiss, which directly targets both the G-spot in the vagina and the clitoris. It has a little butterfly whose wings will keep your clitoris riding high. Even cheaper than the rabbit ($6.99 on Amazon), it is the most-sold sex toy on Amazon. 

However, the reigning champ of surface stimulation is the Hitachi Magic Wand. This will cast a spell on any and all who try it. It comes with two speeds (high and higher) and multiple attachments, and it will last for years. You need not worry about batteries: this bad boy plugs into the wall to provide the most powerful of vibrations.

For those who prefer sole penetration of the vagina and/or anus, don’t worry, I got you. One tasty option is the Lelo. With multiple models, it is one of the best vibrators out there. It’s rechargeable with various vibration modes and more power than you could ever desire. Despite being among the most powerful vibrators on the market, it is virtually silent. Thus, it is great for communal living—if you’re not screaming from pleasure.

Despite common belief, sex toys are not just for those with internal plumbing. If you have external plumbing, you have plenty of options. Some of the best known come from Fleshlight. Fleshlights are masturbation sleeves that are contained in a cylindrical container. They come in different shapes, sizes, colors, textures and even orifice openings (anus, vagina and mouth). The best part of it is that you can customize your Fleshlight to your own preferences. The only caveat is that they can be a bit pricey. 

If you are looking for a cheaper option that still feels delicious, try the Cobalt from A masturbation sleeve with a titillating inner texture, it will only set you back $12. You can also try the Tenga Egg. These deceiving eggs look sweet and innocent, but they pack a punch. With six different textures, these will only cost you $7.50, but be warned: they are designed for single use.

If you are looking for something to use with your partner, there are plenty of options. Try finger vibrators, such as the Blush Finger Vibe ($20 at Early2Bed). Apart from being great for diddling yourself, they are amazing to incorporate into partner play. In addition, you can try the We-Vibe. This is a C-shaped vibrator that stimulates both the G-spot and the clitoris. It is also small, so while the good vibrations are rolling, your partner can penetrate you so that you can spread the love. Also, be sure to check out vibrating cock rings (like the Magic Touch Cock Ring for $16 at Early2Bed), which shake things up in all the right ways.

This is by no means a complete list. As always, there are disputes as to what works best. However, judging by personal experience, experiences of friends and numerous online reviews, the aforementioned toys have lived up to expectations. Although some are pricey, many of these toys are built to last. Best of all, you can use them whenever you want. In addition, none of these vibrators contain phthalate, a known cancer-causing chemical present in some vibrators. (Be sure to do your research before buying.)

Shipping for all the vendors I have mentioned is discreet. The packaging shows no sign as to what scrumptious sensations are packed inside. So treat yourself a little. After all, we all deserve to have that special friend who is there to turn our frown into an orgasmic moan.

Good Vibes,

Tasty Temptations

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