Usually we listen to songs for pleasure. They remind us of happy times, sad times and those times at parties when we may have indulged a little too much. But in 2002, the radio waves were blessed with a ballad of a revolutionary nature. Khia, an up and coming R&B artist, did not just want to remind us of good times: she wanted us to take her song as an academic experience. She did just this by singing a line so powerful and insightful, it resonates with almost anyone. This profound line was as follows:
“My neck, my back, lick my pussy and my crack.”
Despite being vulgar and salacious, Khia actually makes a valid point: oral sex feels good. Whether you’re playing the skin flute, giving lip or playing in someone’s backyard, oral sex is gratifying and an important part of many people’s sex lives. Let’s sit down and take some notes in Khia’s Oral Sex 101.
The first verse begins with the following: “First you gotta put your neck into it, don’t stop just do it, do it.” In addition to being pithy, Khia is preaching the truth. If you’re going south of the border, make it count. If you decide to perform anilingus (oral sex on the anus), don’t half-ass the job; make those toes curl!
One of the worst things in the world is having someone who is obviously not into it go down on you. This can make the receiving partner feel guilty, even if they didn’t request oral sex to begin with. We don’t want that, right? If you do consent to engage in oral sex, get into it. Sex is a like a performance with another person. For the performance to be the best it can be, everyone has to be actively engaged. Would you want to be stuck with a partner who recites their lines robotically? Hell nah. So make sure you’re not that monotone partner and show your partner how much “performing with them” matters to you. When you tickle their pickle with your tongue, give a little moan. When you take them into your mouth, make it seem as if you’re eating an ice cream cone stacked with all your favorite flavors. Show that you want them to feel good. Do this and before you know it, you’ll be gripping the sheets, too.
Khia continues with: “Then you roll your tongue from the crack back to the front, then you suck it all ‘til I shake and cum.” The lesson here? When performing oral sex, use plenty of tongue. Did you know that your tongue is the strongest part of your body? It is indeed, my dear friend. And trust me, you can do some heavy lifting with that sucker. Furthermore, the tongue is soft, naturally lubricated and warm. Use this weapon of mass seduction to your advantage.
Start off by teasing your partner with a few softer licks with a relaxed tongue. This is especially important for those performing cunnilingus (oral sex on the vulva and/or vagina) or anilingus: these primary licks help “warm your partner up.” Once you “warm it up,” play around a bit. Use stronger strokes of your tongue on different places to see what they respond to. Stiffen your tongue to a point and use that to delve deeper into the vaginal or anal cavity. Use the same stiff tongue to flick your partner’s clitoris rapidly to elicit some riveting results.
Want the neighbors to know your name? Rub your partner’s glans (head of the penis) on your tongue and hear just how loud they can scream your name. Use your tongue like an expert and you can bet your partner will be left shaking and wanting more.
Perfecting your oral sex technique takes some practice. Like all other situations in sex, you also have to tailor the experience to what your partner(s) likes. However, with a little practice, you can ensure that you will do Khia proud and get an A+ in Oral Sex 101.