Cooking with Tasty Temptations

Two enthused consents. Three cups of passionate kissing. One and a half cups of fondling. Two heaping tablespoons of 69. Two cups of missionary position. Three and a half cups of doggy style. Three teaspoons of butterfly. Five cups of cowboy. Four cups of leapfrog. Spoon to taste and mix well. Yield: sex of a lifetime.

Like any good recipe, my “recipe” does not have one “ingredient.” My recipe requires several “ingredients,” added in a certain order to lead to my favorite dish: good sex. Under no circumstances should your recipe be a one “ingredient” list. Oh no, child. Come with me and let the master chef show you how to make your dish something worth screaming about.

There is a horrendous misconception that those who partake in multiple sex positions are slutty, nasty or sleazy. Sex positions are not only for the kinky, lewd or freaky. Different sex positions just help spice things up in the bedroom (or wherever you decide to knock nasties). Furthermore, different sex positions stimulate different things. Although one position may be great for you, it may not have the same orgasmic effect on your partner. For example, during heterosexual sex the missionary position is not going to do much for those who require clitoral stimulation. Although the missionary position allows for deep vaginal penetration, the poor clitoris is left uninvited to the whole bonanza. Have the clitoris join the party by having the female partner climb on top, allowing her to grind her clitoris against the male partner’s body. Furthermore, the male partner will have access to the female partner’s clitoris, allowing the male partner to directly sauté that sofrito to a delicious finish. “Bone” appetit. 

There is a plethora of kinky contortions from which you can choose. Feeling a little animalistic? Channel your inner perro and “do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.” Missing the rodeo back home? Climb on top of your partner and ride to your heart’s content. Want to have your cake and eat it too? Make your calculus professor proud by introducing the number 69 into the equation. No matter the occasion, there is a sex position to fit.

Some positions require intense strength and flexibility. Others require little more than enthusiastic consent. There is something for everyone. However, not everyone can do every position out there. As I have mentioned in past articles, kama sutra isn’t my area of “sex”pertise. I horridly lack the flexibility, strength and sheer talent required to fold in half while hanging upside down by my toe, all while bumping uglies at precisely a 47-degree angle. 

Certain limitations can also apply to those who wish to pursue some backdoor action. Due to the curvature in the rectum, typical “penis-vagina” sex positions may not always work out. Some of these positions can send penetrating bodies directly into the walls of the rectum, which can elicit sensations that are not so sizzling. Thus, be certain to take the proper considerations when exploring anal sex, such as propping one’s hips up on a pillow. By doing so, you will ensure the pleasure is nothing short of delectable.

There is no shame in not being able to do certain positions. Much like how it takes a few tries to make the perfect soufflé, sex positions may take some practice to get down. This also means that, like making a delicious soufflé, one can practice sex positions until made perfect. There’s nothing wrong in that, right? Therefore, I encourage you all to do some practicing. Do some Google searches or check out for some sexy ideas. You never know which recipe will lead to the perfect plate.

Facebook Comments

Leave a Reply