I started coming out of the closet when I was eight years old. Back then, a few friends knew that I identified as bisexual, but it wasn’t until later on that I felt comfortable calling myself gay. I told more and more friends my secret, and eventually, I found myself with my first boyfriend when I turned 16.
My friends helped me keep him a secret until after two months when I finally felt comfortable revealing my true colors to my school. I asked my boyfriend to homecoming, and we made sure to do the whole shebang. We matched ties and shirts and walked in together hand in hand. Aside from several stares, it turned out to be a good night.
Fortunately, it was also my first homecoming dance, and it was where my grinding trains became famous. As my partner was off to the side, I had a line of five of my female friends in front of me. It wasn’t until a few songs later when I looked down and noticed that the Trojan Magnum that I had brought with me for the night managed to come out from whatever hard thrust I had done before.
Sheepishly, I bent down to pick it up, only to meet a few knowing stares from my friends who I was with for the night. I just laughed and went back to dancing. By 11:00 p.m., the dance was over, and we made our way to T.G.I. Friday's for dessert.
We were with two other couples when we sat down at a booth away from the center room. Throughout the entire meal, I was met with a hand down at my crotch, because my boyfriend thought that it would be funny to give me a boner in front of my friends. I was keeping it cool until he slipped his hand into my pants and I let out a shriek, which got everyone’s attention at the table.
As I went to the bathroom to fix myself up for whatever else we would do later that night, I also shot a text to my mom letting her know that I would be home late.
Although I expected us to head to our spot at the lake by my house, we ended up staying in the T.G.I. Friday's parking lot. We cuddled in the backseat, and suddenly cuddling turned into oral. He asked me if I brought a condom, which I did to his delight, and he slid it onto my shaft. Now, I never expected myself to be the kind of person to have sex in a restaurant parking lot at midnight, but there was something so Titanic-esque about fogging up the windows that I was down for the occasion. Plus, I still think that this experience marked my love for exhibitionism.
While I enjoyed the dangerous idea of being caught, I was struggling with the insertion in his backseat. We lacked lube, and trying to find an easy position to top in the backseat of a tiny Chevy Cruze was not ideal. We eventually got the hang of it, but it ended up with him banging his head repeatedly against the window and me hitting my head against the roof. It was the 'perfect' end to this night.
Unfortunately, I had to pull out after fifteen minutes. Under the tight circumstances, plus the fact that I didn’t stretch after my cross country meet earlier that day, I got a cramp in my leg that I was shifting most of my weight on. We ended up going back to oral, but I wasn’t in the mood anymore since the cramp made me flaccid. Somehow, we finished each other off and I finally got to go home.
With a good night kiss, I picked up my clothes in the backseat, haphazardly put them on, and tried to sneak inside. My mom, unknown to me, had stayed up the entire night until I got home, and she was greeted by an unbuttoned shirt, shoes in my hand, and unzipped pants. I guess you can say that my mom also experienced my first walk of shame with me.